Why Taylor Swift Has Taught Me Everything I Need To Know About Life

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Admit it: Even if you tried restraining yourself so tight, to the point where you couldn’t move a single muscle in your body, you would still miraculously manage to break out into an effortless, where-did-this-dance-move-come-from boogie to Taylor Swift’s catchy tunes. Whether her scary-exact-pulled-straight-from-your-brain lyrics relate to you or not, it really is inevitable.

I may get a ton of flack for what I’m about to say, but, as Swift would do, I’m just gonna “Shake It Off.” Taylor Swift is my spirit animal. I am literally her, just a few years behind, and with a much smaller bank account. Just like Taylor, I use my words to write my feelings out loud so that you can physically feel what I’m feeling. I love writing about things that people can relate to so that they can cope with me, I couldn’t care less if my blog posts make me look like a crazy ex-girlfriend who can’t get a guy, OH, and if you piss me off……. I WILL write about you. #TWINNING.

It makes me laugh every time someone asks me who my favorite artist is, right before I proudly tell them, “Taylor Swift!!!” Their reaction is somewhat similar to, “Ohhh Godddd…” For some reason, it’s become the “cool” thing to hate on her, but people have become so prone to hating the idea of honesty, which is really unfortunate, because that’s exactly what Taylor stands for.

I have to admit that she has been the absolute best (and cheapest) therapist I’ve ever had. Every other year, all I have to do is make a purchase of $13.99 when her album debuts, and just like that, I’ve gotten thoughtful, honest and accurate insight that have helped me through the “Happy, Free, Confused and Lonely (at the same time)” 20-something years of my life. Sometimes I find myself breaking out moves I never even knew I had to songs like, “22,” or crying my eyes out in a bubble bath to songs like, “All Too Well.” Her albums depict the most vivid, exhilerating, dark story about the past years in her life, and for some reason they always accurately reflect some aspect of my life, too. And as a public figure, I have to look up to the fact that she has been such an incredible role model to not only the lost 20-somethings, but to young girls all over the world. Her good-girl physique proves that in order to succeed as a celebrity, you don’t have to balance a champagne glass on you bare ass on the front cover of a magazine or get arrested for thinking you can get away with driving like you’re playing Grand Theft Auto. Props, Tay.

PSA: This is not a blog post to try and get anti-Swifties to start liking her, because we all have our own taste, just as her songs aren’t written for the sole purpose of making the haters think she’s less “crazy.” I simply just adore this human being. So in honor of the release of her newest (and personally my favorite) album, 1989, here is what Tay and her shockingly accurate lyrics have taught me:

Embrace change (even if it scares the hell out of you)

Song that inspired this: “Welcome to New York”
Standout Lyrics: “When we first dropped our bags on apartment floors, took our broken hearts and put them in a drawer. Everybody here was someone else before. It’s a new soundtrack I could dance to this beat forevermore.”
Seeing as this is the first song on Tay’s new album, I immediately thought, “Ok, a fresh new start, this makes perfect sense.” My mind immediately reverted back to last year, when I made the bold decision to move to Los Angeles (besides the fact that my job forced me to move here). I was scared to death because none of my friends or family were moving remotely close to me. But moving here was the change I needed so badly in my life. I bitch about the traffic and the “crazy people” here almost daily, but everybody came here because they had a dream or a vision, and that is a magical thing. They left who they were before, and found themselves, just like I have, and that’s what the 20’s are all about, right?

The only real failure you make is the one you didn’t try

Song that inspired this: “Blank Space”
Standout Lyrics: “Cause we’re young and we’re reckless, we’ll take this way too far. It’ll leave you breathless or with a nasty scar. Got a long list of ex-lovers, they’ll tell you I’m insane. But I’ve got a blank space, baby, and I’ll write your name.”
SO, I know Taylor wrote this song to poke fun at what the press depicts of her dating nature, but I dug deeper into it. Not only is this probably one of Taylor’s best songs in the history of Taylor Swift geniosity, it makes me feel so much better about the many “failed” relationships, job interviews and just plain awkward encounters I’ve endured over the past few years. Come to find out, it’s only made me stronger. With that said, I’ve come to learn that trial and error (and not just when it comes to dating) is the only way to learn who you are and what you want. Don’t get me wrong, I still whine about being rejected to those lucky few who get to hear me bitch while plowing through a box of chocolates, but at the end of the day, I am so glad I put myself out there (and I eventually get a helluva laugh out of my own rejection stories). One of these days, it just might pay off.

Don’t sweat the small stuff

Song that inspired this: “Shake It Off” (DUH!)
Standout Lyrics: “But I keep cruising, can’t stop, won’t stop moving. It’s like I got this music in my mind saying, ‘It’s gonna be alright.'”
I literally have a dance party with myself in my head every time this song comes on. But what’s even better, is that my dad even admitted this song is catchy. I was mind-blown those words even exited his mouth. But anyway, let’s face it: Not everybody is going to like you, and there will be people who will always talk about you, but the only opinion that should ever matter is the one inside our own minds. I LOVE that Taylor addresses everything the press has ever said about her, and is subliminally saying, “F*&#* you all, who’s the one that’s having fun?” Even Taylor herself admits her dancing is a little questionable. But that’s the beauty of it.

Get rid of the toxic people in your life who are holding you back

Song that inspired this: “Bad Blood”
Standout Lyrics: “Band-aids don’t fix bullet holes. You say sorry just for show. If you live like that, you live with ghosts.”
I’ve always been the type of person who hates cutting people out of my life, including the ones I know add nothing positive or beneficial to my life. I give out second, third and fourteenth chances like a free blinking coupon dispenser at the grocery store. It takes a lot of courage to stand up for myself (I still feel like I’m going to pee my pants when I have to confront people), especially from someone who is your ideal introvert, but I have to hand it to the people who have forced me to stand up for myself and build the confidence I needed to walk away in the first place. Why waste time on people who don’t treat you with respect, who take advantage of you and who need all those extra chances to prove themselves? Let me tell you, it’s exhausting. As soon as you rid yourself of the toxins, you’re finally paving the way for yourself to continue thriving. It’s really just science.

Even if you can’t see it, the worst times in your life are the most beneficial

Song that inspired this: “Clean”
Standout Lyrics: “The drought was the very worst. It was months, and months of back and forth. Hung my head, as I lost the war, and the sky turn black like a perfect storm. Rain came pouring down, when I was drowning, that’s when I could finally breathe.”
Have you ever looked back on the worst point in your life and thought, “Wow, what if that hadn’t happened to me? How different would my life be?” Of course, at the time, you’re thinking that there’s no way you’ll ever get through it and that everything is the worst and that life is over. No, just me? Anyway, congrats, guys, because we made it! These are probably my favorite lyrics of Taylor’s because they’re so accurate, in the sense that when I thought I was helplessly sinking into a black abyss, that’s when my strength, confidence and passion that I didn’t even know existed deep down inside of me, emerged out of nowhere. I constantly look back on these moments and thank the dude upstairs (and the other dude that is my ex that is rotting in hell downstairs… just kidding) every day for throwing these curve balls my way. Our struggles and obstacles are what make us who we are at the end of the day. BRING IT.

There will be that person who sweeps you off your feet, but until that day comes, never settle

Song that inspired this: “How You Get The Girl”
Standout Lyrics: “Remind her how it used to be, with pictures in frames, of kisses on cheeks. Tell her how you must’ve lost your mind when you left her all alone and never told her why. And that’s how it works, that’s how you get the girl.”
Obviously this is real life, and guys are not going to come crawling on their knees begging for a girl. BUT, I can say that no guy is worth crying over if he doesn’t fight for you at some point (that is, if you aren’t being an evil monster period-induced beezy to him). We’re only human and we all screw up. But there’s a difference between an occasional “oops,” and a high-flying red flag. Don’t settle for the guy who calls you at 11 p.m. to “hang out.” Don’t settle for the guy who uses, “I’m just so bad at texting,” after texting you back 72 hours later, as an excuse (we live in the 21st century — texting skills run in our veins). Better yet, don’t settle for excuses. You may have to kiss a lot of frogs to find that one prince, but all the wrongs are only paving a clear-cut path for the right one. So be patient… Alex.

Above all else, your best friends are your true soulmates, so cherish them endlessly

Song that inspired this: “New Romantics”
Standout Lyrics: “And every day it’s like battle, but every night with us is like a dream. Baby we’re the new romantics, Come on, come along with me. Heart break is the national anthem, we sing it proudly. We are too busy dancing to get knocked off our feet, the best people in life are free.”
This last week, I was a wreck. I hadn’t cried so hard in what seemed like forever (seriously, I was on a good streak). Every little thing seemed to be crashing down on me at once because, of course, when it rains, it pours, right? I needed to get away so badly, so I called two of my best friends and all I needed was to tell them what was going on, and they said, “Let’s go.” That quick getaway left me feeling more love than I ever expected. We laughed until we cried, ate at the trendiest places in Palm Springs we could find, let 70-year-old retired golfers casually grind with us, possibly skinny-dipped in the pitch black pool after too many vodka sodas, spent our life savings at Del Taco and squeezed into a king-sized bed at the end of the night. Having these incredibly uplifting and supportive friends in my life to pick me up when I’m slipping, to console me, to laugh with me and to do everything in their power to never let a tear fall from my eyes again — they are the real romantics.

Taylor-Tot, OUT.

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